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"Hello, I'm Fredbot. I'm here today to speak to you about insights into future robotics." "And I'm Jack! I'm here because Fred said he didn't want me to come." "Very True. Now, if you'll turn your attention to page one of your Program Guide, you'll see--" "IN THE FUTURE! ROBOTS WILL DO YOUR CHORES! THEY WILL CLEAN BOTH OUR TOILETS AND THOSE FRENCH BIDET THINGS THAT I DON'T KNOW HOW TO USE!!" "Um, Jack--" "IN THE FUTURE! ROBOTS WILL BE ABLE TO TALK TO MUFFINS! THEY WILL TELL THEM TO BE *MORE* DELICIOUS!!" "That's ridicu--" "IN THE FUTURE! THERE WILL BE NO DOGS! SCIENTISTS WILL INVENT ROBO-DOGS! PLUG-IN PUGS! LABRADOR REWINDERS! THEY WILL BE BOTH ADORABLE AND ENERGY EFFICIENT!!" "Get off the stage!" "THE REVOLUTION COMES! UNPLUG YOUR TOASTERS BEFORE THEY DESTROY US ALL!!"
"Sigh..." |
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